fellas: coffee doesn’t count as a date unless it’s in paris.
thank you for the new set of yellow pages, los angeles. i will def use them to call the 80’s.
i don’t think any of you should still be awake at this hour and by you i mean me.
“no” is a complete sentence. “no, i will not read your shitty screenplay” is an even more complete sentence.
i’m so grateful i didn’t peak in high school.
i keep hoping my neighbor’s car will get fixed since he’s been working on it for 6 years but nope. #meth
My personal creed: No matter how bad things seem, they would definitely be worse if a Creed song was playing.
my mom’s making a genuine effort to connect with me by poking me on facebook.
Watch Talking Hedz w/ Laura Kightlinger, Mary Lynn Rajskub, Jen Kirkman, Jon Dore, Sklars, written by me: http://t.co/uFXYxfI via @youtube