There’s no way you can move on when all the sordid details of a break up are still floating around in your brain. So get it on the page and let it go. Have you tried this? It’s awesome. This is the letter you’re never going to send. Write everything you hated, loved, miss about the situation, everything you wish it could’ve been, all the stuff you wanted to say but couldn’t, etc. The point of this letter is just to get everything out, free flow. Don’t get tripped up on “doing it right” or even spelling it right. You can spell check it later if need be but you may choose not to since you’re the only person who’ll ever see it. You’ll feel lighter and better, I promise.
I really thought we had a connection but then I realized that you are a robot. It’s hard to snuggle with a robot. Your metal encasing is so cold. You remind me of Edward Scissorhands in a lonely castle on a hill cutting anyone who tries to get close to you. I gave you my heart and you pulverized it like it was a beet for your vegetable smoothie. Additionally, I really miss kissing you, our walks, our talks and our travels and I’m so grateful for all that we learned and shared together. I especially want to thank you for inspiring my blog, which makes me so happy to write each day.
You’re Ridiculous, Don’t Contact Me
There is no right way to write this letter. Grief has four stages and comes in all shapes and sizes. So just let it flow. One sentence may be very complimentary while the next may be the worst insult you can think of. Such is the kaleidoscope of human emotions. Just get the poison out and move on without judging it or you, sister-lady or man-fellow!
When you’re done go out and do 10 things that make you feel amazing.
Here are some things I did and loved:
—Took a hike at Griffith Observatory.
—Went to Detox Day Spa in Silverlake for an awesome facial/ massage combo with Asia & Julia (sounds like Wendy & Lisa from Prince but was not like that at all.)
—Signed on to go to a weekend retreat with my pals (@ardenmyrin, @kateflan & more) in Ojai. (Ojai-five!)
—Had a clothing swap with some really groovy ladies (@janiehaddad, @mariathayer, @aliontheair, @aimeemann, @carolinewphoto) & cleaned out and de-cluttered my whole house and got a few new items worth writing home about.
—Went on some dates and wore said new items.
—Made a vision board of my ideal relationship and posted the “ideal qualities” list smack-dab in the center of it for reference.
—Watched videos of Tom Waits & Mitch Hedberg performances.
—Made a plan to shoot a web series with Drew Droege (@glittergarbage.)
Your list might look like this:
—Swim with dolphins.
—Swim with whales.
—Swim with sharks.
—Go bungee jumping in the Outback.
—Zip line from your background to your neighbor’s.
—Take up karate and horse wrestling.
—Plant a garden while on hallucinogens.
—Build a boat from scratch.
—Change your name.
—Join the witness relocation program.
Let me know how it works out for you. Seriously, I love your comments. They make my day! Xox, Melinda